recepticle=Tuesday, May 23, 2006

they don't love you like i love you
i've changed the playlist and updated the songs for the little cloud-type player down there. i think i'll give it a name. let's call him... cloudy. cloudy the mp3 player.

the songs match my rather melancholy mood on this, my twenty-something birthday. i recommend to you, with all my heart, hide and seek by imogen heap. it's so beautiful it makes me weep. and that's something i've been doing plenty of today. maybe i'm just getting menopausal; i have been wondering why blood hasn't been pouring out of my cock lately. wow, that was tasteful.

please wish me a happy birthday - i need some virtual hugs.

- posted by lawrie at 7:05 PM ~ comments

Wednesday, May 17, 2006

lord of war
i've been so terribly terribly busy, i've only had time to make one teeny tiny new-fangled widget in the past couple of weeks.

indextwo has been linked to from the official blogger help archives for about two years now, with the following description:

  • Using Blogger with Flash - A series of tutorials. Click the "Blogger Flash Tutorials" link from the main page.

    • when the blogger staff added the link, they asked if there was any way to directly link straight to the tutorials, which there wasn't, and i always thought that was kind of lame. so, i made some changes. you see? see the url? it's a totally awesome direct link!

    i emailed blogger about this fancypants new change three weeks ago and have yet to hear anything back. anyone want to give them a little nudge? because for the life of me, i can't find out how to do it through the blogger site.

    p.s.
    it's my birthday in just under a week. that's next tuesday. the twenty-third. just in case you were wondering.

    *cough*

    - posted by lawrie at 2:27 PM ~ comments

    Sunday, May 07, 2006

    it comes back to haunt you
    inspired by one of the very few emails about the flash blogger tutorials that addressed a question that wasn't "i broke the flash. fix it", "i didn't read your tutorials and now i can't get the file to work. fix it", or "why doesn't it work on geocities? fix it", i have written another tutorial:

    applying css to your flash blog.

    it's strictly for flash mx 2004 and above, so i wait with bated breath for the veritable golden shower of emails that say "why no work in flash mx??? i r doing it all xacty in tute!!!". surely that's worth a vote for a poor, defenseless flash developer?

    for those of you who constantly pester me about the indextwo devlab; leave me alone. isn't it enough that i announce a big project, offer free samples to a select few, and then fail to follow through with my promises in any way, shape or form? don't you know how busy i am? i recorded an album with steve albini, you know!

    only joshing - i'm a cheeky rapscallion, me. the devlab will be up as soon as i've figured out how to make it look pretty, and not like i'm offering two really crappy and utterly pointless flash toys for an extremely limited audience, most of whom will be so unimpressed that their hair will fall out.

    - posted by lawrie at 1:12 PM ~ comments

    Thursday, May 04, 2006

    emailz r fun II: mission to moscow
    wow, the may 1st reboot really has inspired a lot of abuse for poor little lawrie. unfortunately this latest fink used a non-working email address, so i have no recourse but to answer publicly. and so it goes:

    he said:
    email: friendless@battlingbutler.com

    "i know something that you probably don't want me to know. you've been hiding behind various proxy servers and voting for yourself on the may 1st reboot website. just post "I admit it" on your blog and no-one else shall know."

    gasp! so i said:

    "wow, the name 'friendless' may be the most wholly accurate pseudonym anyone has ever come up with. do you start a lot of interpersonal relationships with an attempt at blackmail?

    here's some key pointers for you:

    a) i don't even know how to hide behind a proxy server,
    b) i'm 13th on the list, a whole 220 votes behind the clear leader, which, if your accusation were true, would make me one of the crappiest cheaters in history, and
    c) i've stated publicly that if i did win anything, i would donate the prize to any charitable cause that may be able to benefit from it, meaning that if i'm cheating, i not only suck at it, but i stand nothing to gain as a result.

    so here's a new deal; why don't you post "i've gone to take a flying fuck at a rolling donut" on your website? then we'll call it even."

    - posted by lawrie at 11:48 PM ~ comments

    Wednesday, May 03, 2006

    emailz r fun

    'ryan' said:

    "your site sucks!! i couldn't even email you. your stupid blog just rambles and makes no sense and your only cool thing...the star wars quiz...made me the emperor instead of darth vader. DIE! are you even hot?"

    then i said:

    "you did email me, i just didn't respond initially because i thought you were a dick. but, you proved to be a *persistent* dick, so i thought you should get some kind of response. even if it was to confirm that you clearly are a dick.

    you haven't read a lot of blogs lately, have you? do you reply to everyone who posts a bulletin on myspace, saying "stop posting rambling bullshit!" no? thought not.

    i have never claimed that my blog does anything other than ramble; most people tend to visit for the free flash tutorials i offer, the little widgets i code, and the help i consistently give out to burgeoning developers.

    and for all your whining and bitching and complaining, you still posted the fucking jedi quiz result on your myspace profile, didn't you?

    now shoo."

    - posted by lawrie at 7:29 PM ~ comments

    Monday, May 01, 2006

    out of the grey and into the black
    welcome one and all to my shiny new green paradise, delivered to you courtesy of the may 1st reboot. and the internet. obviously.

    i've cheated slightly with this blog post; it's currently five minutes to midnight on april 30th, a litte over 14 hours before the official time for the reboot, but at this precise time i shall be carrying huge, heavy sheets of plywood up five flights of stairs and nailing... uh, nails into lengths of timber and generally carrying on like a burly, manly man. i hope i don't get any splinters.

    so, take a poke around and see what you think. i promise; it's not all it's cracked up to be.

    edit: if you're interested in the vague notions that float this little boat, then check out the site faq.

    another edit: i didn't realise this whole reboot thing was up for a vote; i thought i was decided by a panel of judges! anyway, i swore that i would give whatever the prize turned out to be to charity, so if you feel so inclined, vote away.

    - posted by lawrie at 2:00 PM ~ comments